I’ve never wanted to live alone. To me living alone has always seemed like a bad idea. I don’t want to be lonely or lazy, have high expenses or tons of housework. I don’t want to have to call people to hangout with all the time, or spend money at bars or on dinner just socialize. Living with people means there is always something interesting going on, a friend to make, a meal to learn about, a story to take part in. Why would I give up people for a little quiet comfort?
Significant others are a bit different than housemates, and I’m sure living with a significant other can be just as easily compared to living alone as with living with housemates, but to me living with people just makes sense, financially, socially, and mentally. So when I watched a Buzzfeed video the other day about the joys of living alone, I was surprised to find myself slightly considering the possibility of making the switch. After 27 years of living with others, could I finally be changing my tune on housemates?
My reactions to the nine points in the video are as follows:
- Clothing is Optional
- You’ve got my attention Buzzfeed. Sure I still sneak from the shower to my bedroom naked once or twice a week and I’m close enough with my current housemates that I can wear only a sports bra when I’m cooking dinner, but in general I do have to lock myself in my room if I don’t feel like wearing clothes. What is it like to be able to wander naked all the time and not just on special occasions when I know they’re all out of town?! Kind of sounds awesome.
- No one eats your food
- That is a real thing? You mean I can buy things, put them in the fridge and they won’t disappear? This is a big deal.
- You can keep it as clean or as messy as you want
- I swear I used to be okay with a messy house. But after living with my parents in a post college setting I somehow morphed into my mother and now cringe every time I see a dirty kitchen. My housemates have not learned this lesson, and the idea of common space that isn’t filled with random crap that they haven’t touched in months sounds like bliss.
- You have peace and quiet
- Meh, I like noise. But I also don’t mind being alone, never have. And thats why I’ve always been so adamant about living with people. If I didn’t who knows how often I’d make the effort to socialize..
- You can have anyone over
- I never invite friends/parents over because I’m so embarrassed of our messy house. Thats pretty sad, and I know I could be more stern with my housemates about their mess, but it is easier to just go somewhere else.
- You can pee with the door open
- Let’s be real I do this already, though I do always feel like I’m taking a bit of a risk.
- You can be as weird as you want
- You mean I can scrapbook in the living room? Eat broke girl concoctions? Or watch days worth of musicals on YouTube without getting weird looks?
- Random dance parties
- I definitely do this anyway, and many time this is better with housemates. But I’d have more choice over the music selection, and could do it naked, which are plusses.
- You finally feel like an adult
- I still don’t really feel like a grownup, but while picturing my life in an apartment on my own for the first time I saw myself as an adult. And also for the first time, I realized being an adult is pretty cool.
I hear you, Aurora. I love the house where I live, but I have also had the passing thought of how nice it might be to have one’s own place. For me, I guess, the biggest negative is simply that renting your own flat is just so expensive! When I think about the other things I could be doing with that money, it just doesn’t seem worth it. Then again, maybe someday when I have a *real* job, things will be different.
I guess I have never lived alone. I went from roommates to a husband, but in both of those scenarios there were weeks where the other person was gone, so I was living alone. I actually like it from time to time–as an introvert that works for me. But I’m not sure I would like it 100% of the time. Assuming you get married and have kids someday, as most people do, that will be the end of living alone at least for quite a long time. So, now’s the chance I guess if you want to try it out. There are definite perks to being in complete control of your own place! I say, go for it. Or, choose just one person you know will be a good roommate, and live with them.
Agreed! The people matter and the expense is essential. There are so many other things to spend money on or save money for – the idea of paying any more than I already am is a non starter. And for all the positives of living alone, there are just as many negatives. So I’m staying put for now, and it’s likely that when I move in the future it will be into another collective home, hopefully with people that I’m slightly more compatible with. But really, I think for me some people are better than none.