Patience has never been one of my strong suits. I know that it’s a virtue and all that, but knowing doesn’t make having patience any easier. This is a struggle I’ve dealt with pretty much my whole life, but it’s been coming to the surface again recently.
You see, I would say that right now I am in a season of waiting, and that is not my favorite place to be. When I graduated college I was ready to take the world by storm—work for a nonprofit, and travel the globe. But nothing worked out. I didn’t get any of the jobs I applied for, and I couldn’t afford to pay my own way. So I waited. In the meantime, I fell in love, got married, and started a job that was decent, but not really what I wanted for the long term. So, it’s not like I haven’t done anything in the last two years, but there’s so much more I still want to do.
Now, my husband and I are both itching to get out in the world, travel while we still have limited responsibilities, and no children to worry about. But when he lost his job this summer, it put a huge damper on our plans, and anything we had saved started to dwindle away. So now I have to be patient all over again. All I want to do is run around the globe, but instead I’m stuck working my same job, and not thinking about moving on to anything else, because we desperately need my steady income. Now don’t get me wrong, my job is fine. I like it, I’m getting leadership experience, and I work with some great people. But I can’t help but long to explore other cultures, other places, even if it’s only for a couple weeks here and there.
However, even though my husband is starting to work again, we are nowhere near being able to afford a trip to California, let alone a trip around the globe. So I have to grin and be patient. My least favorite thing. I feel like I am experiencing all the worst parts of being an adult right now. I have to balance our finances and work as much as possible just so we can survive. Meanwhile I hear all these great stories of my friends going abroad and getting these amazing opportunities. I know this season will pass, but I am so bad at being patient as I wait for my time to come.
I know it sucks to feel like you’re in limbo. For the record I’m proud of you for staying strong and working so hard! Even though I’m one of those people who’s abroad and having adventures, honestly plenty of times I just wish I had a normal life in Seattle where I could wear whatever I want and wouldn’t have trouble finding basic items at the store…your time will come! I say start a piggy bank and put all your change in it. In a couple of years it could easily add up to a trip somewhere.