I’m just going to come right out and say it. I’m poor. My husband and I don’t really have extra money. What we have saved up is probably what most middle class couples would spend on a weekend getaway. We drive a beat up truck that doesn’t even have a real headlight because we can’t afford to replace it.
I’ve gotten pretty used to our lifestyle so it doesn’t usually bother me. Of course there are a lot of things that I would love to spend money on, but I just don’t have that option. I’m used to the thought process that goes like this. “Man, I really could use a new XYZ, mine is wearing out. Ugh, but a new one is at least a hundred dollars, so no, I won’t get it. It can wait.” It sucks sometimes, but it’s my life. I don’t normally feel bad about it.
But a few weeks ago, my husband and I started going to this newly married’s group at our church. We thought, this could be nice, meeting other young couples who are similar to us. But then we actually went to the group. The thing is, all of them were pleasant and friendly, but we still felt very out of place. And the reason was money. I am not joking when I say that every one of those other couples was significantly more well off than us. It’s very hard to relate to people talking about buying their second house, when you’re sitting there hoping you have enough money to pay rent that month. We don’t have anything in common with them. And then it starts to make you wonder. Am I the only newlywed in the world who has money problems? Is it really that weird that I can’t afford a new Audi?
Realistically, I know that we aren’t the only people who have these struggles, but it’s frustrating to be made to feel that way. I find myself wanting to go up and shake some of these couples and yell, “Do you actually have any struggles in life?” I’m sure they do and that everything isn’t as hunky dory as it seems, but it’s just been a really awkward experience for us. We feel like the outcasts in the corner who everyone knows about, but doesn’t know how to approach. This whole time I’ve thought that being in your twenties was a time when most people had the common struggle of low finances, so how did I end up in a room full of the only twenty somethings who actually got an amazing job right out of college and who make probably 3 times what I do. I don’t know what to say to these people! And it’s pretty obvious that they don’t know what to say to us either.
Maybe we’ll start a lower class rebellion.
That does sound like an awkward situation…but surely you DO have some things in common with these people. Your finances might be different, but that shouldn’t mean you can’t be friends. Hopefully as you all get to know each other more you’ll find out how you can support them with their unique struggles, and they can support you with yours…isn’t that what it’s all about? No, it’s not weird that you can’t afford a new Audi. I am sure many of our blog readers out there can completely relate. I think it’s good to talk about these things, even if it’s a little uncomfortable. It’s no wonder there are so many blogs, books, and TV personalities talking about money–it’s a big deal to everyone.