A field guide to growing up without growing apart
Being in your twenties is generally a time period in which you move around a lot. So this month, we thought we’d talk about our places of residence. What we like, what we don’t like, and what makes the ideal environment for a 20 something. The ideal […]
My work has been in a state of chaotic upheaval for the past 3 months. I know I posted before about some frustrations at work, but that pales in comparison to our current situation. In late January, our manager announced that he was too […]
I’m just going to come right out and say it. I’m poor. My husband and I don’t really have extra money. What we have saved up is probably what most middle class couples would spend on a weekend getaway. We drive a beat up truck that doesn’t even have a real headlight because we can’t afford to replace it.
I’ve gotten pretty used to our lifestyle so it doesn’t usually bother me. Of course there are a lot of things that I would love to spend money on, but I just don’t have that option. I’m used to the thought process that goes like this. “Man, I really could use a new XYZ, mine is wearing out. Ugh, but a new one is at least a hundred dollars, so no, I won’t get it. It can wait.” It sucks sometimes, but it’s my life. I don’t normally feel bad about it.
But a few weeks ago, my husband and I started going to this newly married’s group at our church. We thought, this could be nice, meeting other young couples who are similar to us. But then we actually went to the group. The thing is, all of them were pleasant and friendly, but we still felt very out of place. And the reason was money. I am not joking when I say that every one of those other couples was significantly more well off than us. It’s very hard to relate to people talking about buying their second house, when you’re sitting there hoping you have enough money to pay rent that month. We don’t have anything in common with them. And then it starts to make you wonder. Am I the only newlywed in the world who has money problems? Is it really that weird that I can’t afford a new Audi?
Realistically, I know that we aren’t the only people who have these struggles, but it’s frustrating to be made to feel that way. I find myself wanting to go up and shake some of these couples and yell, “Do you actually have any struggles in life?” I’m sure they do and that everything isn’t as hunky dory as it seems, but it’s just been a really awkward experience for us. We feel like the outcasts in the corner who everyone knows about, but doesn’t know how to approach. This whole time I’ve thought that being in your twenties was a time when most people had the common struggle of low finances, so how did I end up in a room full of the only twenty somethings who actually got an amazing job right out of college and who make probably 3 times what I do. I don’t know what to say to these people! And it’s pretty obvious that they don’t know what to say to us either.
Maybe we’ll start a lower class rebellion.
As many of you know, Sleeping Booty is currently on a European adventure. Now of course she is having a lot of fun, but recently she admitted to the fellow princesses that she was missing quality girl time. She expressed the need for some female […]
If any of you have watched much of How I Met Your Mother, you already know exactly where I’m going with this post. In one episode, Ted talks about the character Murtaugh from Lethal Weapon. One of his most famous lines is “I’m too old […]
I am in a very interesting position at my workplace right now. For the past two months my supervisor has been on maternity leave and I–lucky girl that I am–have taken over a lot of her responsibilities.
Now of course, I meant that to be sarcastic, but when it first happened I did actually feel lucky. It was a chance to prove myself. It meant that I actually had enough actual work to do that I didn’t have to get creative in filling my time. But then the holiday season hit. Suddenly we were swamped with people, employees were calling out, and our equipment was breaking down. A perfect storm of total crap hit me straight on. And because our supervisor was gone, everything was being handed to me even though I didn’t actually have any “official” authority. Let’s just say I’ve been doing work far above my pay grade.
Now I like working hard, and I don’t mind having responsibility, but it is pretty annoying when you have the extra work and responsibility,but none of the perks that are supposed to come with it. The best example is that I am currently making everyone’s schedule, but because I am not officially management I don’t actually have access to the software in which we are supposed to record the hours that people are working.And of course, this also means that when someone has a problem with their schedule, I have to email the manager to get approval to change things or tell people that they can or can’t have time off, even though he never looks at the schedule and doesn’t actually know whether or not it should be approved.
But all of this I have been dealing with and doing fine. I’ve been taking everything in stride. But then tonight…..Tonight I got a very entitled email from our lowest level employee stating that the most recent schedule I had posted wasn’t going to work for her and I needed to change it. I double checked her availability, I hadn’t scheduled her during any time she wasn’t available. I combed my emails seeing if she had sent in a request to have that day off–she hadn’t. And yet she thinks that after a schedule is already up she can just email me all nonchalant and I will cater to her every whim and mess everyone else’s shifts up because she’s suddenly decided she doesn’t feel like working on a certain day. Now I keep my cool at work, but this was too much for me. I was suddenly burning with a white hot anger and I couldn’t take it out on her and discipline her because I’m not actually a manager. Needing some sort of outlet, I resorted to doing quick ninja kicks aimed at nothing and shaking my fists up and down. I wished I was a manager so badly so that I could respond to her email by saying “if that’s how you feel, you can go ahead and feel falsely entitled in the unemployment line because your ass is fired!”
But of course I can’t do that. I don’t have the authority to do that. Instead I have to suck it up, wait until I’m less angry, and respond politely, letting her get away with being a pretentious bitch. I know that realistically, even if I were a manager, I would still need to keep my cool and respond calmly. But after going through so many frustrations the last couple months, I really wish I could just let it all out to this girl. It would be so incredibly satisfying.
My job isn’t really terrible, and I do still enjoy it most of the time, but it has just been a frustrating season, and I want it to be over. I’m sick of having to be so flexible in shifting back and forth between the management role, and the worker role. It’s exhausting. My work world is just too weird right now.
It’s everyone’s favorite time of the month again. Since we just started a new year, the princesses decided to do a bit of reflection. Being in your twenties is the awkward time when you don’t really feel like an adult but you don’t think you’re […]
I’ve been dreading Christmas. Usually I love Christmas, but this year my husband is off working on a ship and I am spending Christmas alone with my parents. To me this sounded like a recipe for disaster. Not because I hate my parents, but because […]
Concerts; Fun and yet riddled with chaos. I am definitely a music lover, but I am also very cheap which means that I don’t go to concerts very often. Last week was the first time in a few years that I have gone to a concert. Actually I went to two in one week, which never happens. I had a lot of fun, but there were also many things that irked me about the concert atmosphere. It was one of those moments when I tangibly felt “I’m too old for this” and marveled at the attendees younger than me who seemed unperturbed by what I categorized as major annoyances.
For one thing, there is the lack of proper food. At the first concert I went to, outside food was strictly prohibited. So prohibited in fact, that they made everyone in line go through the ridiculous act of turning out their pockets to make sure no one was hiding anything! My friend even had to take his wallet out of his jeans pocket because “it looked suspicious” to the staff. Now, because I was overly cautious to begin with, I actually was able to smuggle some granola bars into the arena via secret inside pockets, but the whole thing was still ridiculous. And the first concert I went to was a whole day event with multiple acts, meaning I had to survive for about 9 hours solely on a few granola bars. Sure, I could have paid 7 bucks for a stupid pretzel, but I refused to give in on principal, and all of the food they offered would not have resulted in happy digestion anyway.
Secondly, the noise level was completely insane. Now, I can see all of you rolling your eyes and thinking, she really is a grandma complaining about rock music being too loud, but hear me out. I have nothing against loud music. But when the AV people have turned up the amps so loud, that from my spot in the nosebleed section of the very back of the arena I have to plug my ears—it’s too loud! My friend who was up by the stage informed me later that she couldn’t get to sleep when she went home that night because her ears wouldn’t stop ringing. It was upsetting because I was listening to music that I enjoy, but it was so painfully loud that I had to plug my ears to stem the suffering. Loud is good. Loud is fun. Earsplitting is just plain stupid.
My final annoyance comes from the second concert I attended. This concert was standing room only, and we wanted to be close to the action, so we got up as close as we could to the stage. I am glad that we got to be so close, but let me just say one thing. I HATE MOSH PITS! I have no desire to be shoved around by sweaty strangers and have my toes stepped on 100 times. The funny thing is that this band was not even really mosh inducing, but the crowd was still annoying. I legitimately had about 5 inches of space between me and the person in front of me, and yet there were numerous people who kept trying to weasel their way into that 5 inches to get closer. It was completely absurd. I literally kept stiff arming people so that they would stay the hell back. I understand that you want to be by the stage, but guess what? So does everyone and if you actually took two seconds to access the situation you would realize that you are shit out of luck because there is no room for you to go anywhere, so stop trying!!
Ok, my rant is over. I don’t want anyone to finish this post thinking that I had a miserable time at these concerts. Of course, the good music made the whole experience worth it. I just wish that some things could be different. I want to enjoy live music, but I want to enjoy it with some breathing room, an adequate food source, and without going deaf. Is that really too much to ask?
(Also, I just have to add a small post script inquiring why a sport/concert arena that has a capacity for 20,000 people thinks it’s a good idea for the women’s bathrooms to only have 4 stalls?? Seriously—WHY?)
Right now I am in a real life odd couple situation. My husband has been away from home for the last month working on a cruise ship. But right before he left, one of his best friends moved into our guest room to stay for […]
There are many awkward things about being in your twenties. We talk about a lot of these things on this blog. Awkward relationships, career paths, schooling choices, you name it. Recently, however, I’ve stumbled upon an awkward part of my twenties that I’d never fully […]
This morning was the second time I have sat crying on the bus in the last week. I realize that makes me sound depressing and and unstable, but let me explain the circumstances.
As those of you who have been following the blog might know, my husband lost his job this summer and was struggling to figure out what he wanted to do in life. After a lot of closed doors and endless searching he realized he wanted to enroll in a two year program that will give him training to be a mate on a boat. I was fully supportive of this plan, and glad that he had something to strive for because I knew it would be good for him. However, that training doesn’t start until March. Until then, he figured it would be a good idea to try and get work on a boat of some sort so that he could log hours of what they call “sea time” which you need a certain amount of to get through each level of training. He had an interview with a cruise ship company and they decided to hire him on the spot, and asked him to be in Connecticut in one week. One week to prepare for my husband being gone for two months straight. Hence the hysterics.
You see, I don’t do well being alone. And my husband and I have never been apart for longer than 24 hours since being married, and never been apart for longer than 12 days in our entire relationship. I realize that there are a lot of couples who have to deal with situations like this, but that doesn’t make it any easier. My emotions are so close to the surface right now, that they are liable to burst out at any moment. Unfortunately those moments keep happening on the bus. I will say, I didn’t help the situation by listening to emotional ballads by the script and the lumineers…
Anyway, my husband leaves tonight at 10:30pm on a plane and I have no idea how I will handle it. Stay tuned.