A field guide to growing up without growing apart

Tag: future

Condition of the Month–January

Condition of the Month–January

What’s the best and worst thing that could happen to you this year? Surely that question has crossed all our minds at some point during January, the month of resolutions, hopes, and dreams. Let’s see what we all came up with! We’ve purposely excluded a […]

Wait- did someone say ‘jobs’?

Dudes, you want to know something scary? I have started to think about… jobs. It’s a terrifying word, I know.   I’ve still got some time but I feel the scariness of job-hunting breathing down my neck; soon it will catch up with me. I […]

Condition of the Month- January

It’s so hard to live in the moment. So often we find ourselves wishing for the golden years that were, or yearning for a future that holds something better. So this month I thought we should discuss where we find ourselves right now. Are we living in the past, the present, or the future? And is that what we really want?

cinderslut tile (2)

Wow, hello 2015! Can you believe we’re this far into the 21st century already? It seems like not so long ago people were freaking out about the millennium and Y2K. My husband is currently sitting next to me on the couch reading off a list of uncomfortable, yet true, facts about the year 2015. For example, the movies Silence of the Lambs, Hook, and Father of the Bride were in theaters on a date closer to the moon landing than to today. I don’t know about you, but New Year’s isn’t a favorite holiday of mine, because it lends itself so easily to feelings of lost youth, the passage of time, etc. But still, I can’t change the fact that a new year has dawned, and, for the most part, I am very excited and forward-thinking about all that’s yet to come for me.

I always have something I’m looking forward to, to the point that I actually downloaded a countdown app for my phone so I can always know exactly how many days are left until whatever: my wedding, our next vacation, a visit from family, etc. These days one thing I’m longing for is the summer, when I’ll be able to come home and visit everyone for the first time in a year. I had a great Christmas staying overseas and traveling with my hubby and his parents, but July still feels like a LONG time from now, and that’s starting to wear on me a bit. Having my in-laws visit also touched a nerve that shows itself from time to time: the desire to move home for good. It was just so nice to sit around the table with family…now with them gone again I’m looking forward to moving home more than ever, though not enough to actually do anything about it—yet.

I’m also just going to put this out there: 2015 just might be the year I get pregnant. This is the year I turn 27 and my husband turns 28, and I start the last year of my teaching contract here. These things all add up to what might be a great time to start a family. So yes, I’ve got a ton to look forward to in 2015 and beyond. More travel, visiting family, coming home for good someday, and becoming a mom. With all that in mind though, I still have to remind myself that I am where I am for a reason. It’s hard to live in the moment, but since this is the season for goals and resolutions, I might as well add that one to the list.

sleeping booty tile

I’ve been soul searching a lot lately, doing anything I can think of to figure out which career path is right for me, and while I spend more and more time attempting to think of my future, in reality the more pressure I put on myself to decide the further I feel from it. Lately I just can’t see where I’m going, just can’t see anything past tomorrow. I keep waking up from nightmares of insecurity in not only my professional capacity but personal as well, freaked out because if I‘m not proud of myself neither is anyone else. Why can’t I just live in the present for a few minutes to help me figure things out?

But I’m not living in the past either, though it’s definitely not for lack of trying. I’ve been attempting to scrapbook my high school things and over Christmas a ton of my old friends came back to visit. I’ve been going through the old motions like I used to, but as much as I love living in the past I just can’t connect as well as I used to. Something was off this week, my wave length just that much different from all my friends. I said dumb things and cried more than usual, felt overly sensitive and while we all had fun, it wasn’t the same as it used to be, it wasn’t even the same as last year. I know living in the past isn’t great for me, but it’s important to me to be able to get back there when I need to. What does it mean that this week I couldn’t?

So I guess my answer is that I’m living in the moment, but pretty unhappy about it. Unhappy is the wrong word because I’ve been busy and distracted and generally jovial, but I feel guilty for not being able to relate to my high school friends as well as I used to, for not keeping in touch with college friends as well as I want to, for losing my confidence and for not knowing how to move forward like I know everyone else is.

little merskank tile

I wouldn’t really call this a season of longing for me. There are many good times in my past, but I couldn’t say I am longing for any of them.. not in particular. Neither am I longing for the future.. I mean, I hope my future will hold many good things, but I wouldn’t trade in this moment now to find out. Really, I am very happy where I am now. I am starting into the third year of my PhD and I still love it. From the beginning, everyone warned me ‘are you sure you really want to do a PhD? By the end you’ll be sick of it.’ But I really love what I study and the environment where I study. I am also pretty happy in the rest of my life. Each season of life has its own trials, but this one has been a really good one. So yeah, I am happy where I am and wouldn’t trade it in! I am just hoping the days don’t pass too fast.

snowwhore tile

I am definitely in a season of looking ahead. I have been frustrated and feeling stuck in my current job for so long now. And I finally decided to take a risk. I was offered a position with a hotel, but they wanted me to start at the bottom and work my way up again. I was torn for a long time about it. I may be unhappy at my current work, but I can’t guarantee that the new company will be a lot better. Plus I have to take a pay cut. But everyone I talked to thought it seemed like a good opportunity.  Today I accept ed the offer and signed papers. It seems surreal and very very scary. I still find myself asking what the hell am I doing? Why leave comfort and predictability? But I have to look ahead and hope that everything is working out the way it should. I believe that this new job may offer me more possibilities in the future, but of course I don’t know. None of us ever know for sure. Living is risky business. I find myself wishing I had a crystal ball. Can’t I jump ahead a year and see if I’m happy or unhappy or if my plans worked out the way I’d hoped? But then, things never work out exactly as we think they will. And that’s terrifying and exciting all at the same time. So please, wish me luck.

One Step Back, Two Steps Forward

As 20somethings we’re no strangers to failure, often finding ourselves paralyzed by indecision or blinded by ambition. We cringe daily at what we didn’t do and what we haven’t become, what we said and what we believed and yet, as much as we stumble we […]

What Happens When Your Dream Comes True?!

The idea of a Bucket list has never really appealed to me. It seems like making a list of things to do before you die is so definitive and constricting. What happens if you die without completing it? What happens if you complete it and […]

Condition of The Month: June – Who Inspires You?

GUYS! WHEN DID JUNE HAPPEN?!

I feel like I always say this but, seriously, has spring gone by too fast for anyone else? Now that June is here and my Grand Euro Adventure is coming to a close I’m really feeling the pressure of heading back to my ‘real life’ in the states (and finally figuring out something like a career). When I left for Europe I hoped that come June I would have everything sorted out, but here I am a few weeks from home and still no plan in sight.

So for this month’s COTM I’ve asked my fellow princesses to talk about who inspires them and how they hope to inspire others. Maybe by thinking about the types of lives we want to lead we’ll be better able to place ourselves within them. And hey, a little reminder of what matters can’t hurt, right?

<>><<>><<>

cinderslut tileInspiration! What a great topic. I just went with the first three people who came to mind, though many other people around me have influenced and inspired me throughout my life. To start with, there’s my husband. Cliché, I know, but I really love the guy. He isn’t without his flaws, but as I’ve gotten to know him over the years, as I’ve seen him at his worst and his best, I continue to be inspired. He’s easily the smartest person I know, and the things he’s been able to accomplish academically, in research, and in his career definitely impress me. Along with that, I’m inspired by how hard he works. While I tend to be a bit of a slacker at times, adept at knowing how I can get by with the least effort, he takes work, school, or projects at home seriously, and, as a result, he always produces quality work. He inspires me because he teaches me things, and he’s always trying to learn more himself. He makes me want to work harder and be better.

Then, if I think about famous or noteworthy people in the world that I admire, a name that quickly comes to mind is Malala Yousafzai, the young Pakistani girl shot in the head by the Taliban in 2012, who has since become a world-renowned spokeswoman for girls’ education. She looks just like the students I myself was teaching in October 2012, which is both terrifying and sobering. Malala grew up in rural Pakistan, enduring living conditions I’ll never have to experience, but loved going to school so much she refused to stop, even after receiving death threats. When I look around American public schools, I am awed at the students who will skip school with only the thinnest shred of an excuse. Malala had every excuse in the world not to continue her studies, but she did anyway, and she has never stopped speaking out for her beliefs. She’s inspiring—I’d recommend her book I am Malala for more information about her.

And while we’re on the topic of education, something very close to my heart, I’d like to say that teachers are the third “person” I find inspiring. I’ve known so many great ones who inspired me to pursue my own education and become a teacher. I’ve seen first-hand the work that is required and the sheer amount of crap they put up with, all for the sake of their students. Included in this shout-out are my grandmother, who moved to Cuba in the 1940s to teach and continued to teach high school for decades to help support her family, my mother-in-law, who after doing this job longer than I’ve been alive still puts in more hours than any teacher I know, my aunt, who is still teaching Kindergarten as she nears age 70, and numerous other friends, family members, and coworkers. It’s a selfless job, and they’re generally quite underpaid, but their legacy is priceless.

My hope is that my own students will be as inspired by me as I have been by the educators in my life. At the end of my first year of teaching, my kids showered me with so much love and appreciation. I knew then that I had succeeded in some small part—I had inspired them, and that made every long hour I had spent worth it. In two weeks I’ll see those same students cross the stage as high school graduates, and let me tell you: I can’t freaking wait.

<>><<>><<>

little merskank tilePeople I am inspired by?  Well, as a Christian, I spend a lot of my life trying (and failing) to emulate Jesus, who was super inspirational.  Loving people, caring for the weak, the outcasts, the poor, and not being afraid to stand up to the big know-it-alls of his time.  Saying that we need to love everyone, even our enemies.  I can’t think of anyone more inspirational.

Finding other examples of inspirational people is harder for me.  I mean, almost everyone I know (both in real life and throughout history) has some traits that I find inspirational mixed others I wouldn’t want to emulate.  It’s the nature of the human condition—none of us are perfect.   However, I would say that recently I have been feeling challenged by those figures in history that were able to do what they think was right without caring a whit what other people think.  Think about Martin Luther.  Now imagine you were in Luther’s place: breaking from the one holy church—being excommunicated by the Pope whom most everyone believes holds the keys to heaven.  Now that takes guts.  Serious guts.

I was recently one of his treatise where he declared that he would ‘freely speak my mind’ regardless ‘if any of the Catholics laugh or weep’.  I have a hard time stomaching even a hint of disapproval from those around me, and here is Luther alienating the majority of the world.  And he doesn’t care.   You can feel it in his letters—he surely cares about what God thinks—but wooing the approval of the leaders of his time (or anyone else for that matter) is at the bottom of his list.  Now, Luther’s actions are not universally admirable.  Beyond not caring what others thinks, sometimes he goes out of the way to insult them with egregious insults and doesn’t seem to put very much into understanding other people or their perspectives  (If you think I am joking, try out the Luther insulter and you too can be insulted by Luther: http://ergofabulous.org/luther/ ).  So yeah, I wouldn’t say he is a very good example for ‘loving your enemies’.  However, I am inspired by his confidence in God.  Luther never spent time kowtowing to others or shying away from confrontation—things I am guilty of way too often.

Now finally, the question of whom I inspire?  I am not sure.  I would say that I try to inspire academics around me by not stressing continually about my work.  Of course, I am imperfect at this, and all the time catch myself stressing or obsessing.  But I do believe that the kind of general over-whelming sense of stress and gloom that can arise in graduate school is destructive.  The end of the world does not occur if you don’t hand in your thesis on time—the end of the world does not occur if your chapter isn’t as good as you’d like it to be.  I think it is easy to fall into a false perspective that raises your individual daily trials to a position above all else in your life.  After all, if you’re looking there is always something to stress about.

<>><<>><<>

sleeping booty tileI love that my parents never stop moving. They came to meet me in Italy for ten days in April and I’ve never been so tired in my life, the three of us running around ruins and cities from dawn till dusk. They work hard and play hard, always managing to stay focused on the present even though their lives are spinning fast. They build closets and gardens on the weekends after bike rides and yoga classes, ski on their mornings off and play poker on the weekends. They have great friends who better their lives and have no trouble connecting with strangers. They get up early and talk about their days, stay up late to finish things for work or a project for their friends.  As cheesy as it sounds, I want to be (almost) exactly like them when I grow up. What better way to live your life than to take advantage of the time you’re given?

Sophomore year of high school a new girl showed up and my life has never been the same since. Julia and I had math and physics classes together and her enthusiasm to learn was unlike anything I’d seen. She loves life and so many things in it, talking passionately about film, music, landscape, political change, horses, medicine and writing just to name a few. What I love about her most is that she isn’t just interested in these things she goes after them too, taking the steps she needs to make what she wants a reality. She’ll start a conversation with a stranger and then give them her card, seek out the best in the field and then ask for an internship. She makes things happen and encourages me to do the same. When I’m nervous or insecure about what I want or how to go about it I think of her and know that she would tell me to try anyway. Sure she may change her mind next week and throw herself completely into something else, but isn’t that what life is about, the full on attempt?

But honestly, as awesome as all the real people in my life are, none of them inspire me as much as Spiderman. For the last few months I’ve started to think about Spiderman every day (it’s been easy since everywhere around the world children and adults are wearing Spiderman t-shirts). He’s become a source of strength and responsibility for me, someone who helps me get through hard things and inspires me to have fun while doing it. He reminds me that life is short and I have a duty to be my best self and help when I can, that I owe it to the world to do the many things I’m capable of. Sure, I don’t have to chase through the train station to return someone’s dropped ticket – but Spiderman wouldn’t even hesitate.

But he’s imperfect too, just a kid who is trying his best and never quite fully succeeds. He makes mistakes and is always just a little behind, exhausted because there is always so much to do in a day. Do I always do my best or take the time to do all I can? No, definitely not. But when I think of him I know that next time I’ll do better, that in the consistent attempt I’m making a difference.

I hope I inspire people to do all these things and more. I hope I lead by example, helping people explore their surroundings and say yes to new experiences. I hope the people around me work to see other points of view, and are reminded to be kind, generous and easy going. I hope I’m diverse and strong, intelligent and reasonable. I hope I inspire people to be happy, to see that the world is an incredible and beautiful place.

<>><<>><<>

snowwhore tileI’m sure I could name a lot of famous heroes from history past and present like Mother Teresa or Nelson Mandela who I do definitely admire for their dedication and spirit of love.  But the people who really affect me, have the ability to speak into my life and change me for the better, are the extraordinary ordinary people who populate the spaces of my everyday life.  So who are these top three people?

(in no particular order)

  1. Cinderslut: I don’t know anyone else who has determination quite like Cindy does. I met her in the first week of our freshman year at college, and ever since then she has blown me away with her ability to set goals and conquer them.  Whether that’s deciding that she wants to be a teacher and acing her way through college to make it happen, or knowing that her brothers need a role model and forcing them in any way possible to have real conversations with her about what they want out of life.  She helps me find strength that I didn’t know I had.
  2. Merskank: You would be hard pressed to find someone who is more loyal or truly caring than Merskank. This fall will mark 20 years of friendship for us, and I can honestly say that I wouldn’t have chosen anyone else to be with me during the crazy years of growing up.  There were some seasons that we didn’t spend as much time together, but we always came back together.  She is my sounding board and often the voice of wisdom when I feel that I’m losing my mind.
  3. Booty: She streaked into my life as bright as a comet and I continue to follow her shining trail.  She taught me to grab as much out of life as you can. I often find myself trying to see the world as she does, because it is more beautiful that way.  I can honestly say that I learned to love myself better because of the way she loves and encourages me.  Everyone wants to be around her because she brings out the best in everyone.

*** Snow didn’t notice there was a part two to this question so while she thinks about the ways she hopes to inspire other people I figured it couldn’t hurt to write a quick paragraph of my own. I still want to see yours though! Snow inspires us in so many ways. She’s loving and enthusiastic, tough and enduring, raw and openhearted. She fights for what she believes in and forgives in an instant. She takes the time to appreciate the world (and people) around her and she trusts herself to know what is right. She is radiant and intelligent, creative and joyful, unique and loyal. She’s a blessing and everyone is the better for knowing her. She inspires me to show my love for people, because life is so much better when shared.

Some people just don’t belong in your life

So about a year ago when I was planning this whole travel through Europe adventure, I invited everyone I talked with to come along. And when I say everyone, I mean everyone. In normal, everyday life this over invite plan works out well since half […]

Can You Be Friends With an Ex?

I woke up this morning to an email from an old… flame, and I… I don’t really know how I want to process it. Really long story sort of short (read: remember that data project I was working on?), he and I became close during […]

Condition of the Month – November: Quarter-life Crisis

OUR QUARTER LIFE CRISIS IS HERE!

In the spirit of me and Cindy turning 25 in a few days, I’ve asked the girls to discuss their Quarter Life Crisis for November’s Condition of The Month. Maybe it has to do with Thanksgiving gratefulness, or maybe it’s just because we’re all doing way better than we could be, but I think this twenty something life looks good on us.

<>><<>><<>

little merskank tileSo, I feel like I need to begin by establishing that I am the youngest member of the naughty princesses.  Unlike my more-mature counterparts, I just turned 24 at the end of August, so for me 25 still seems a terrifying- yet distant- number.

But why is it terrifying?  I mean, I know it shouldn’t be, but 25 just sounds so… old.   Somehow I am still carrying around my teenage vision of being 25 which involves sexy pencil-skirts, a sophisticated free-lance career, and a studio apartment in New York City.

Somehow I now seriously doubt that will be my life at 25.  And honestly, I don’t actually want any of those things– I have never been a pencil skirt person, and who needs New York when you have England anyway?…  But still, that vision exists somewhere there in the back of my mind with the words: twenty-five stamped on it.

But a quarter life crisis? I don’t think there will be much of one for me.   I am really happy with my life right now– so although I know that 25 will not meet my teenage expectations, I think it will supersede them!  I am looking forward to replacing those Hollywood-influenced illusions with real experiences and memories.

<>><<>><<>

sleeping booty tileOHHHH BOY. Where to begin? Well did I mention that I was living at home and unemployed this time last year? Or that I still have no idea what I want to do with my life? Or that I’m planning on quitting my perfectly acceptable job in February to burn through a ton of cash while exploring Europe? With absolutely no inkling of what I’ll do when I get back? And as for envy and comparisons, two of my fellow Princesses are married and the other is putting her all into a career she loves (while dating a boy who writes her love letters), while my closest relationships are with my brother and parents – all of which will change completely when I move out in a few months. So yes I’m definitely feeling behind on this whole grown up relationship/career/home/life thing.

But here is the thing guys, I’m oddly calm about all of this. I feel the strongest and most optimistic I’ve felt since I was deciding which college to choose. I feel young and lucky and beautiful and intelligent, ready and excited to begin this second quarter of my life. There is so much I know I can and want to do, and at this point I’m incredibly confident that I’ll do it.

It feels like I’ve pushed past the crisis already, coming out of the turmoil and uncertainty of my early 20s with easy joy and trust in my abilities. Maybe I haven’t really begun the crisis yet and come 27 I’ll be crying alone in my room sad that nothing worked out. Or this could even be the eye of the storm, a brief moment of false security before the crippling anxiety hits again. But right now (and for the last few weeks) things seem to be looking up.

When I think of who I’ve been I’m proud of her decisions and I trust my future self to make the best choices she can as well. Sure I might not be living the best life imaginable, but I am trying, and while I still have no clue about anything, I know that I’m not supposed to. It feels great to be taking action in my life, not just in my upcoming travels, but also in wrapping up old to do lists, pushing myself to say yes to things that scare me and making plans for new ones. It’s okay not to have all the answers yet, and as long as I’m willing to work hard until I do, that is all that matters.

<>><<>><<>

snowwhore tileWhen I was thinking about how to answer this question, my first thought was that I wasn’t really having a quarter life crisis. Then I realized that this wasn’t really true, it was just that my crisis was not entirely my own, and not an entirely typical quarter life crisis.

You see my crisis involves my husband.  Mostly, it involves how I relate to him while he is in crisis, and how I can mature in order to support him and stop being selfish.  As most of you know, we’ve been through a whirlwind together and most recently he accepted a job aboard a cruise ship meaning that he will be gone for at least six weeks.  This is my crisis. I know that he is doing what he needs to do, but I need him to be here. I know how I should handle it. I know that the adult thing to do is bear this burden gracefully and be strong while he is gone. However what I have done is burst into tears and freak out when I have to deal with car licensing paperwork that would be his responsibility were he around. I know that I can be independent and make it on my own for a while, but I don’t want to! The stress I feel is the stress of knowing the kind of wife I should strive to be but holding stubbornly to my selfish desires anyway. I want to be the kind of wife who helps him achieve his dreams and willingly sacrifices her time and effort to support him. But more often I find myself wanting to tell him he should never leave my side because I hate it when he’s gone.

<>><<>><<>

cinderslut tile (2)I am about to turn 25, and I actually feel…pretty good about it. Oddly, I remember having a harder time turning 23, knowing that my college years were over and I had to enter the land of true adults. Well, two years have gone by since then, and I do think I’ve acclimated to being an adult, while still staying relatively young at heart. Perhaps because I’m proud of what I’ve done in my twenties so far and I’m pretty content with my life, 25 isn’t looking so bad.

Actually, lately I have been absolutely in love with my twenties. So much so that the other day I described to my husband how awesome I thought it would be if we could have TWO decades of our twenties, then have our thirties to focus on raising kids, and then continue on as usual. Obviously certain facts about biology and physics preclude this happy fantasy…but still. Wouldn’t it be GREAT? The fact that we physically can’t extend this amazing decade leads to the conclusion that we should probably just make the most of it, which is what we’re all trying to do here at the Twenty-Something Condition.

I’m not an expert on how to do that, though. I’ll admit I spend my fair share of wasted time on facebook and other non-life-enriching websites, watching TV, doing dull work, sleeping, you get the idea. But I’ve also taken risks and said yes to things I never would have considered in the past, like my current two jobs and the whole ridiculous fact that I live on the other side of the world and kind of love it. I guess I’m making the most of these years as best I can…I hope I improve that skill though, because the years are never going to pass by any more slowly than they are right now.

Am I in a crisis? Not really, though I do often reflect on the passing of time and how weird it is to have lived for 25 whole years. My grandmother died recently, and she was my last living grandparent. In my family, at least, a generation is gone, and that means my parents’ generation will be next, and then…

When I think that way it’s easy to worry that life is passing me by, but luckily I can still snap myself out of that pretty easily, just by looking around and marveling at how wonderful and blessed my life is. To me, that’s a good place to be, no matter your age. Bring it on, 25! I’m ready for more awesome.

I’m Back!

Hey there Princesses, I’m alive! And hello there to all you readers of our little blog that helps us 20-somethings stay in touch! It feels like our audience has doubled in the last few weeks I’ve been off the grid and though we get little […]

Hey Government, Don’t Shutdown My Trip

I leave to raft the Grand Canyon in less than 14 hours. I’m excited. I’m lucky. I’m overwhelmed. I’m all things all at once. But mostly, mostly I’m disappointed. If the Senate and the House don’t come to a decision by tomorrow night the National […]

To Do or Not To Do, List

urlWell hello there blog world! I don’t have much time this week since I’m packing for a rafting trip this weekend (heading down to Cataract Canyon in Moab for four days of river bliss) but that doesn’t mean I’ve forgotten about you!

The last few weeks I’ve been in craft mode overdrive, making not one but three scrapbooks, sewing seven pillowcases (out of a sheet from tjmax), and submitting my quilt to both my county and state fairs. I even designed (and launched) a new blog, transcribed all my fading letters into digital word documents, proofread the second novel I wrote with my fellow naughty princesses and finally got rolling on compiling the hours of video footage I’ve saved from college. It has been AWESOME accomplishing so many things on my to do list, so much so that I’m slightly worried about putting all of this progress on hold while I prep for (and TAKE) my Grand Canyon adventure in the coming weeks.

We have a lot to do in the short amount of time before October 1st. There are boats to gear up, coolers to freeze, booze to buy, arms to strengthen, wetsuits to try on, and a hundred of other little things to think about (we’re going to be living off a boat for 21 days – little things like drinking water and toilets become a big deal). And as excited as I am for all that, I can’t help but be a little bummed to be stopping short of crossing off my entire list.

Until now this year has seemed indefinite, a much needed break from worrying about my future to just focus on saving money and trimming loose ends from the past. But as of September first I’ve started feeling the pressure of the future again, my real life beginning to loom in the distance. It’s exciting, and I can’t wait to start living it, but at the same time I’m not sure I’m quite ready to leave these projects unfinished.

imagesMy next two months are booked solid and November and December won’t be empty either; I already have a trip to Tucson set and trips to Denver and Seattle almost locked down. I have friends coming to stay for Thanksgiving and a Fantastic Europe Adventure coming in February to start REALLY PLANNING for. Time is going fast and I’m starting to worry that I won’t finish all the things I wanted to do this year. What if I start the next chapter of my life still tied down by things from before? What if when I’m there I’ll be wishing I’d had a few more months here?

I still have at least four scrapbooks to make from college alone, not to mention all the memories I need to go through and organize from my pre-college life. I have old music videos to edit, our novel to publish (if we manage to do it digitally we’ll definitely let you know) and there is also this little matter of finishing up THE letter (which btw has turned into more of a novella – clocking in at around 150 pages right now and I’d say is about 75% done… I know this last push is going to be the hardest though, because while I know I’ve already worked through most of the hard stuff, saying goodbye to something I’ve cared about for going on six years isn’t easy). With so much left to do, will I ever really finish?

It’s all good though, because how can I really complain about all the awesome projects I might not get to do because my life is too awesome to have time for them? I’m happy, and being busy is all I can ask for, especially when it’s the kind of busy that I know is taking me places I want to be.